Learning to say no...kinda.

A lot of people ask me why I got into LuLaRoe...I usually jokingly say that I didn't have enough to do, which is truly laughable being a busy Mom of 5 girls. But in part, I'm being honest. In the summer of 2016 I felt uneasy and I felt like I needed to make a change, but I wasn't sure what that meant. After a lot of prayer and some soul searching, I realized that I was receiving a message from above & that I needed to become a LuLaRoe consultant. Weird, right? At least I thought it was totally weird since I only had 1 LuLaRoe dress in my closet.

My first LuLaRoe dress, the Nicole.

There was A LOT of prep work & educating myself that went into getting ready to start this business, but then as soon as my inventory got here at the end of September, I hit the ground running...and I literally didn't stop until Christmas. I sold a lot of clothes and did a lot of things right, but I was also going at break-neck speed and didn't have time to do the things that really mattered to me anymore. So in January of that year, I decided I would cut back on my schedule a bit and make room for what I WANTED in my schedule.

It kinda worked, and it kinda didn't. I basically figured out that I wasn't being successful at either job- my LIFE job nor my BUSINESS job. You know what I was missing? It's that tricky and sometimes evasive word called *BALANCE*. When people ask me the hardest part of any of my jobs, it is definitely balance.

I wasn't ready to throw in the towel with LuLaRoe and I certainly wasn't willing to give up my time with family- so what's a girl to do? Here is my 3 step list in creating the balance in my life:

1. I set a schedule. Each day I wake up and know exactly my goal for my business. I know which posts or graphics I need to create & I know what my to-do list looks like because Monday means my LIVE show, Tuesday means Quick Pics, and Wednesday means Wall Drops, etc. I work at my job during the day, all the while making sure my little ones are cared for, have eaten, and dressed...or at least have clothes ON their bodies. Technology makes it possible for me to be posting on FB while I'm driving my tween to gymnastics, so as long as I've done the prep work, I don't have to work much in the evenings anymore.

My actual planner from last week

2. One of the reasons I didn't throw in the towel is that I honestly LOVE what I do. I love the little community I have created. I love that customers come to me needing advice on fashion, and life. I find great fulfillment in being that person who uplifts, encourages laughter, and tells you that that shirt isn't right for you. If I am not careful, though, I will end up doing this all day long 24/7, so I set boundaries and I've learned to say no, kinda. I will pretty much bend over backwards for you if it fits in my schedule, but I'm not missing the soccer game, I still want to make dinner, and if someone is sick- you'll find your order on my porch because it is a pajama day.
I would also just add that when my work is not fun or fulfilling to me- because it is work- I try to listen to music, church talks, Ted talks, or podcasts to keep my spirit happy while I'm doing the mundane. This is just a piece of advice for happiness in life.

This caption could say "Professional taxi driver"

3. The last thing that brought me balance is the most important. When I was little my parents always told me that I could do anything, and the funny thing is- I believed them. I never struggled with a lot of self-esteem issues growing up and was probably too naive to see the moments where I should have been the wall flower instead of the girl spinning circles under the spotlight.

As I have grown older though, the struggle has been a little more difficult. Motherhood certainly threw me for a loop- changing my body, increasing my hormones, and then making me responsible for tiny humans that depended on me to make good choices for them! As an adult, I went on my first "diet", experienced my first bouts of depression, and had more anxiety than I ever remember having before, and that all happened on one trip to the grocery store! Although I still have so much to learn, I think it really all comes down to one thing, and if we are being honest, it's always been that one thing. Love.

Always a YES for moments like this.

Do you love yourself enough to know when to say NO? Do you love your family enough to know when the answer is absolutely YES? Saying YES to yourself and NO to others can be really tricky. I find that Moms are the most tortured when we decide that its OK to do something for our own mental health, because we have this sense that our family will not survive without us for an hour. Why are we so hard on ourselves?

Just me, trying to keep the planet spinning...because that's my job, right?

I think the key to this is having a goal in mind and deciding what brings us closer to our goal, but that doesn't mean we won't have to scrub a few toilets along the way. So what is your goal? What is it you want to accomplish? And if guilt is your motivator, maybe you should ask yourself WHY you are feeling guilty? And why are you saying yes/no when it spreads you too thin?

This brings me back to the beginning. I said YES to LuLaRoe- for me and essentially for my family. I wanted my girls to SEE what hard work looked like. I wanted them to SEE my struggles and successes. Beyond that, I wanted to help the every-day woman see her greater potential by simply changing what she put on in the morning. It has not been easy and I have made some mistakes- and will make more- but saying YES to this part of me, and handing out the NOs when needed, has made all the difference for me. We only have one life, my friends, let's choose to LOVE it.